10 Ways to Improve Self Esteem

Having a well-developed self esteem is an important, though often overlooked, aspect of being totally – physically, mentally, spiritually – healthy. However, for those of us who have been constantly beaten down by others and by life in general, raising self esteem is easier said then done. The fundamental secret to all the ways to improve self esteem is to TAKE ACTION. Talk is cheap; the only way to get better, feel better, and be better is to change your patterns of activity – in short, your habits. So here are eight ways to increase self esteem that, while not painless, will certainly be effective:

  1. Recognize and eliminate low self esteem symptoms. The symptoms are many, but can include depression, sadness, weight gain or weight loss, trouble sleeping, lack of self-confidence, low performance at work or at school, withdrawing from social situations, and more. Everyone will have different responses to self-esteem, though. While some become more withdrawn, others lash out, becoming angry, impatient, and even violent. You need to diagnose yourself and understand your own response to your feelings. Keep a journal, diary, or log of your feelings for a week, and try to link your behaviors and emotions to your self-limiting beliefs and low self esteem patterns. Knowledge is half the battle.
  2. Based on your personal research, figure out what you want to change in your life. This can be simple or complex, and may involve only yourself or other people. Do you want to lose weight? Are you self conscious about your behavior or your looks? Do you feel aimless or without a mission? You need to figure out exactly what it is you want – no one size fits all in this case, and one piece of advice won’t fit all. Again, self-knowledge is the key. The best methods on how to build self confidence and self esteem will vary from person to person. (There are articles on this site that can help you do all these things.)
  3. Get a system to help you out. There are plenty of systems out there that will help you build self esteem; here’s one bestselling system from Joe Rubino.
  4. If your self esteem issues focus on yourself, make goals according to the changes you desire. If you want to lose weight, do research on weight loss and exercise. If you are self conscious about how you look, do what you can to improve or change it. If you feel aimless, get a career counselor, or figure out your passions.
  5. Many people can increase their self esteem by simply finding a new hobby or passion – too much time spent thinking about our own issues and insecurities only make them more central to our thinking and thus more significant. Finding some mission, or outward purpose, can go a long way to making you externally directed, and thus focused on something more than yourself. In other words, focusing less on yourself can, paradoxically, improve your self esteem.
  6. If your issues deal with other people, things can get more complicated, especially when relationships are involved. Obviously, communication is key. You may have to get a therapist or other third party to help you work out issues. You may also have to cut off the relationship in order to fully get healthy. Each situation is different, so at the very least talk with your friends and family to get the best solution for your context.
  7. If you have general social issues, like if you are shy around other people, then you have to make goals in order to improve this, somewhat related to the method outlined in Way #3. Social goals are in many ways no different than normal hobby goals and the like, so plan and craft your goals in the social realm too.
  8. Find a spiritual center if you don’t have one, or renew your commitment to spirituality. Spiritual in this sense doesn’t necessarily mean religious, so if you aren’t a believer you can still use this method. For you, spirituality can mean anything; but at heart it should emphasize everything outside of yourself, all to take the focus off yourself and give your life some purpose.
  9. To this end, help others. You may find the best way to help yourself is to focus on others. You may see that your problems aren’t truly as bad, or you may gain tools to help you in your own quest. Most of all, you’ll direct your attention to external things, in this case people in need, and eliminate the constant rumination that could be bringing you down.
  10. Don’t give up! Be persistent and never let negativity take you down for good.

3 thoughts on “10 Ways to Improve Self Esteem”

  1. Great topic, self esteem is about confidence and attitude.

    I think that a good attitude to have is: “I’m aware of my flaws, but I’m happy with who I am and I’m working on the things that I want to get better at”

Comments are closed.