If work, children, money, and other stressors are damaging your once lovely relationship, take heart: all is not lost.With enough information, patience, and effort, even the most damaged relationship can be saved from oblivion. Want to know how to save a marriage? Here are some tips:
- Admit that there is a problem and that you want to fix it. You and your partner need to be able to say, “I want to save my marriage,” and mean it. Without commitment from both sides, any expended effort will be wasted.
- Take care of yourself first. This may seem a paradoxical way to save your marriage, but it’s actually vitally important for the well-being of the marriage. If you are overweight, sick, depressed, or stressed, you need to improve your own situation. In part, you will do this as a couple, but this also requires some alone time to sort out your own issues. You may need to seek professional help – counseling, medical doctors, personal trainers, etc. – to help you along.
- One of the most important ways to save a marriage is to spend more time together. Many couples drift apart as work, family, and personal obligations get in the way. You need to schedule in time for each other like you schedule your other tasks. If this partnership is to be saved, both sides must raise the priority of together time to the “A” level.
- Another one of the best ways to save your marriage is to improve communication. Once you are spending more time together, you’ll need to not only DO things, but also TALK about things. Whether it’s about your dreams, fears, or conflicts, communication is critical for healthy relationships. Improve marriage communication and sharing, and the rest will take care of itself.
- Spend romantic time with each other. Go on a date, to dinner, to the movies, or some other locale. It doesn’t have to be expensive or fancy to be effective. Whatever the choice, rekindling some of that magic is one of the most effective ways to save marriage partnerships. If you have kids, consider hiring a babysitter once every two weeks or so to provide you with some free time to pursue your most significant interest: each other.
- Do the little things. Not every change has to be a grand gesture. Little gifts, compliments, and the like can remind your partner that you love and think about them. Sometimes relationships can get too comf0rtable, and partners treat each other with the assumption that they will never leave. While this can be true, it will only lead to suffering for both parties. Act like you did when you were dating, and try to win your spouse’s heart back with both actions and words.
- Money can be a huge stress to a relationship. Make sure to communicate and plan expenditures, savings, investments, and other financial issues. Being clear on the expectations of your financial relationship can often clear up other ‘issues’ between you that seemed to be so pressing.
- For more information, check out this e-course: The Marriage Savior.